thoughts on THIRTY

Today, I am THIRTY!

 

I know for a lot of folks, this is a big milestone birthday, possibly even a thing to dread or skip entirely in favor of being 29 forever, but to me, it’s just a reason to celebrate. Since my intense brush with my own mortality at age 27, every birthday afterward feels like a gift. I’m happy to be here, happy to be relatively healthy, happy to think of all the ways I’ve grown and changed to get to this point. 

I love the Timehop app and this morning it reminded me of some of my recent birthday wishes. As I turned 28, I wished for a calmer year than 27 had been. As I turned 29, I wished for mindfulness, to enjoy my life more. Now, looking back on the last year, I think both came true. This last year has brought new and wonderful friends into my life. I’ve found a groove to my daily routines that works for my family. We’ve settled into our home, church, and neighborhood. I started hosting people in our home a lot more. And while I still have a long way to go on the patience front, I do think this past year has been a more mindful one, one in which I’ve been better able to both stay in the moment AND remain mindful that even the not so lovely moments will pass.

I’ve also found, and others have expressed the same when I mentioned it on Twitter, that as I hit 30, I’ve settled into myself a lot too. I know who I am, and I like who I am. I don’t really feel like I need to prove anything to anyone or even myself. And when I have moments where I don’t feel this way, I’ve learned to be more gentle with myself, too.

I’m not saying I’ve got it all figured out, by any means, but I’m a lot less anxious and a lot more content with the fact that I am and always will be a work in progress, also confident that progress DOES happen.

This weekend as we celebrated this milestone birthday, I had a house full of my favorite people and favorite things, as we threw a cocktails and cheese and charcuterie party that lasted until way past my bedtime. I felt so blessed to share my home and the things I love with the people I love, and I realized that after finally ending the move-every-three-years phase of our life, we have a lovely community to share our life with.

This morning, I woke up next to my sweet husband and was soon piled on by my adorable girls. I’m full of love for this little life of mine. And as I head into a new decade, my wish is that I will continue to work toward mindfulness, and that we can find new ways to share this life and all we have been blessed with with others.