my muffin top is all that

Muffin - IMG_0246

I hope you now have that song from 30 Rock stuck in your head. I know I sure do.

After a tweet about my new favorite pants got a lot of responses on Twitter, I knew I needed to write this post.

Real talk: I may have “lost all the baby weight” but after growing and birthing twins, my midsection is just not the same. You know how some pregnant women’s belly buttons pop out? Mine never went back in. RIP, innie. Thanks for all the memories. In addition, I have something that Internet twin moms call “twin skin.” The skin on my belly basically stretched past the point of return, so now it’s slightly wrinkly and has the texture of a turkey neck.

I don’t say this with any sort of self-loathing. Sure, I miss my “old” belly, my innie belly button, and wearing bikinis or even tankinis. But this is just reality for a lot of us: growing humans changes our bodies, and there is no “getting your body back” 100%. If you are one of those women who can rock a bikini post-babies, count your blessings. If you’re one of the ones who has had to adjust to a new you: welcome to the club. I appreciate my body for what it did and continues to do every day to keep me alive. And I accept this “new normal.” I may sometimes wish there were non-surgical cures for things like ab muscles that never fully knit back together (yay, diastasis recti), or for “twin skin,” but since I’m not willing to go under the knife, I am learning to love and live with what I got.

This means I have also learned to love my mom jeans. All those low-waisted hip-hugging styles I used to love now hit me right around my mushiest part. And not only does that create a “muffin top” that society deems unattractive, it’s straight up uncomfortable. It feels like being permanently pinched by my pants, all day long. I have learned exactly why mom jeans have monstrously long flies:  because they have to go up past the mushy part to be comfy. A higher-rise jean doesn’t cut into my mushy lower abdomen, and instead supports my belly in a way that doesn’t feel nearly as constricting and uncomfortable. Plus, under my long tops (no crop tops here!), everything looks smooth and muffin-top free.

I think the reason mom-jeans got a bad rap was that the pocket placement created flat butt. Luckily for me, even my beloved jeggings now come in high rise styles that hold in my mushy mom midsection but don’t give me pancake booty. Apparently, hip huggers are out and high rises are in, not just with moms but even stylish folks. If I had a gillion dollars, I’d be hitting up Madewell for some of their high riser styles. But since just one pair there is $125, I tend to stick to cheaper options. My current loves are Old Navy High Rise Rockstar Jeans, currently on sale for a few bucks off (I liked their mid-rise version, before, but the High Rise comes up just a smidge higher in a slightly thicker fabric, so I like them better), but I’m also eyeing high rise styles at American Eagle, too (which are apparently all under $30 right now).

So, now my secret is out: I wear belly-button-high jeggings, and I don’t care who knows it. This post is not sponsored by Old Navy, Madewell, or American Eagle, but hey, if any of them wanted to send me some modern mom jeans, I’d totally take them off their hands.

 

Image used above is via Flickr under a Creative Commons license.

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