flashback/flashdance what a feelin’

Ok, you guys, I had to share this.  I walk past that mecca of hipster fashion, American Apparel, on my way to my office every morning.  And what I saw took me back to 1992.  I swear I had this dress, and wore it with leggings and a side ponytail and a hairbow made of neon shoelaces.  If you’re a girl, born in the 80s, I bet you had something similar.  My question is, why do hipsters want to look like me, circa second grade?

Perhaps there’s no use questioning it, though.  Afterall, this is the same company that also makes see-thru mesh dresses, and a strange assortment of neon spandex horrors.

Exhibit A:

In college, I took “Aerobic Dance” as a P.E. class.  It involved watching a very old VHS workout video with a woman who would have been right at home in that shiny pink-and-mesh leotard.  Heaven help me when the first hipster college kid comes into my office wearing something like that.  I might roll my eyes so hard they get stuck.

Exhibit B:

SERIOUSLY?  The crotch of those “harem pants” is more like “I pooped my pants.”  That is one high-wasted, tapered leg, poulterwang-inducing FREAKSHOW of a garment.

%d bloggers like this: